Splitting Personalities

Well, I believe I have just gone officially insane.
You think?
He does, just not all that often. Less than he might like to, uh... OK, stalemated myself there.
Quiet. I'm trying to talk to folk. Pipe down; behave.
Unlikely. We're splinters of your consciousness; we aren't going to go away with a click of the-
*Click* You were saying?

Well, as I was trying to say before these two tried to take over my brain, I've just gone officially mad. It seems that my mind's split into two in a way comparable with mytosis. And then that segment has split, so now I'm left with three conscious beings living in the one head. Lovely.

Of course, the other two are just splinters of myself, as Italic-man up there put it. Therefore I have control of them and they're really just slight amplified parts of me that are somewhat smaller in power and influence. It's still annoying. It's like trying to control three-year-olds... Or perhaps be controlled by three-year-olds.

That's unfair. We're not three years old!
Technically speaking, we're as old as you are. We share your memories.
That's only technically speaking. Realistically speaking, you're around three weeks of age. That was when it pretty much started, no?
Yeah. I wonder what happened specifically three to four weeks ago that could have cause half your mind to go AWOL.
Shut up. That had nothing to do with it.
So the weird dreams about the fish have nothing to do with that?
Not in the slightest. I continue to tell you that I have no irrational fears of fish statues!
We are you. We know your fears. But yeah, you're right - fish statues isn't one of them. How about-
Enough!

So, as you may be able to see, I have a problem. Two problems. And one of them has decided to embolden itself while the other has decided that italics are better. Wonderful. Now I can't use italics without shifting personalities. Isn't that a bummer?

Hey, brother - what would you do if I started talking gibberish?
You mean that you don't already do that?

On second thoughts - or rather first, second and third thoughts - maybe they'll self destruct before they have the chance to actually cage my mind. Time shall be really annoying, 'cos nothing's gonna get better.
I second that.
*Sigh.*

Interrupting Myself

I thought I'd try something new today: A discussion. Read on and you'll see what this 'discussion' malarkey is. Or I could just tell you. Which I will.

Whenever I feel like it, I'll write up a slightly nonsensical fictional discussion between two or more people or things. Because I can.

And here's the first, experimental post. Comments, please.

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It is a common misconception that I am mad. I am here to tell you that I am not mad. I am so NOT mad that I go through sane and out the other side. Therefore, if I talk to myself then it is a mark of having too much sanity, or my past or future self has come along to have a word or two with me. It's most likely the latter, usually. As it is in this case.

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The following is a discussion between Pisces 1 and Pisces 2, two versions of the Professor existing in the same room at exactly the same moment in time. Unless you are strange and have a very rare, dangerous and eccentric anti-thermal energy powered time machine with a built-in paradox-sustaining bubble complex, do not try this at home.

Pisces 1.  Oh, hello I.
Pisces 2.  Hello me, don't you mean, Pisces?
Pisces 1.  Yes, of course. That is the grammatically correct manner-
Pisces 2.   -of speaking.
Pisces 1.   Don't do-
Pisces 2.   -that? Surely you mean-
Pisces 1.   -this.
Pisces 2.   Ok. I'll stop-
Pisces 1.   -if you stop.
Pisces 2.   This is starting to freak-
Pisces 1.   -me out. Exactly when-
Pisces 2.   -are we? Ok, actually-
Pisces 1.   -stop now.
Pisces 2.   I hate-
Pisces 1.   -myself sometimes.
Pisces 2.   Aaargh!
Pisces 1.   Aaargh!
Pisces 2.   Aaa-
Pisces 1.   -rgh!