Hello. Me again. At least I think I'm me. You can never be sure these days. Everyone is a liar. For now though, I will just assume I'm me.
For now I just thought I'd pop in and tell you a tale. A tale as old as the waves in someone with awkward hair, a tale as ancient as the very strange gunk in the shower plughole itself.
This tale is known amongst mortals as: 'The tale of the Fake French Beans.'
Once, many moons ago, the world we live in was the same as it was when this event happened. It wasn't that long ago. Around three weeks. Keep in mind this time is not relative and it will always be three weeks ago, no matter when you read it.
So, in this world, there was a peach that was not happy with life. So he killed himself. But there were also several baked beans. These beans were like every other, but they were glued to a piece of glass and sold as magic beans.
Most people are idiots, and all the 'magic' beans were sold within 42 seconds. They all went to live happy lives with their new families. The end.
The moral of this story is obviously that no matter what you do, you can count on the only one source of infinite power in the universe: stupidity. And from my perspective it appears you don't have any shortage of that resource. Perhaps you should wire your brain to a power generator and get people to ask you difficult questions.
Anywitch, I think that I might be catching peasanthood. I'm off to see a doctor about it.
Goodbye.
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