Wednesday, 21 March 2012

Guns, My Face and Why I'm Slightly Peeved

(This post has been labelled a 'Rant' rather than simply an 'Insight'. This is because this is, without doubt, going to turn into more of a rant than simply a statement of how I view the world. And Rinrei, I'm prepared for whatever response you might have. Please, do feel free to chuck it at me either in person or through the comments section. Either way, I'll learn lots about you from how you respond.)
I'd like to start by saying: Rinrei, I've read your post, and I'm minorly displeased. Not displeased enough to delete your post, or even enough to ask The Editor to do it for me, but displeased enough for you to have reason to take note of my displeasure.

Firstly, how this all began: I posted yesterday with a post named 'Heartlessness, and Why I Don't See it as Bad', outlining a controversial view of why speed bumps are unnecessary. I said in the post that it was a controversial view, but also stated that I think I have a right to talk about what I think. It wasn't all that serious, but CERTAIN PEOPLE just take things too far.

Why am I displeased? The simple, three word answer is: Rinrei's recent post. In said post, Rinrei told the story of what happened this very day - how she brought a toy gun with her and pointed it at my face.

I actually have no objection with this story being told. It's a fair enough subject for a post - it has some scope, is what I'm saying - but it's all in the telling, isn't it? I simply don't like how it was told. But I'll get to that later. First, I need to lay down what I disagree with. All the below quotations are from the post by Rinrei entitled 'My Weirdness, and A Gun'. (Click the title to take you to the post itself. I encourage you to read it first.)

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"So, I took the gun and pointed it at his (Pisces) head. He flinched for a second, and then started laughing. Little nut job."

OK, first thing I'm pointing at: Little nut job? Have we an idea of who's actually calling me a nut job? This is Rinrei, the one pointing a toy gun, loaded with a foam bullet, at me. She has no right to call me a nut job, nor little, for that matter. After all, I'm about a head taller than Rinrei. So way. (Rasp!)

Secondly, read this passage through:
"I pointed the gun at Pisces again after he cheated at a game of chess with my friend, Bear, and I was given permission by Skald to bring out the gun. Of course, I did it. It was after Skald left that Pisces got annoyed with the gun pointed at his head and began to annoy me too. Then I shot him. In the eye. The truth was, I pulled the trigger by accident, but that doesn't matter. It taught him that I really would shoot, but the lesson is never learnt."
There are several inaccuracies that I wish to point out here. Firstly, I did not 'cheat' at that game of chess. Those of you who know me will know that, when playing chess, I never cheat. However, this doesn't stop certain people from claiming that I do in a futile attack on my reputation and integrity.

What happened here was that 'Bear' (why 'Bear', Rinrei?) and I were playing chess, and I made to make a move, but when I decided not to make that move, Skald attempted to stop me. This is because I had taken my fingers from the piece which I was contemplating moving. Now I was unaware that the game I was playing was being played under the 'Fingers Away, Other Player's Play' rule. This is due to the fact that I never play using this rule, and it's generally accepted that when we play, we play nonchalantly and without such petty rules as that. Skald insisted I make the move that I had aborted in blatant disregard of the rule that I had no idea was in place. Because nobody told me we were using the One-Touch rule, I couldn't have known to play accordingly. Therefore the blame is shared. So it can't be said that I cheated, as I didn't do anything wrong. After all, I made the move after a certain conversation with Skald anyway, so your point is moot.

Next, pulling a gun - no matter how fake - is not going to make any situation imaginable better. What I mean is that it's not going to relieve any tension at all. In fact, I see that particular action as offensive and an invitation to a confrontation. Making an aggressive move such as that is simply asking for somebody to get annoyed, which had apparently already happened. I credit Rinrei's poker face with that - when showing any sort of negative emotion, her face goes blank and you can't tell how annoyed/frustrated/angry she is at all until she kills you. You get the picture.

Threatening anyone is really just asking for it. End of story. Except, it isn't the end of the story. I have further objections to list.

You say you shot me in the eye. You're wrong. You actually shot me just under my eye, in the cheek. I simply said, rather loudly, "You almost got my eye, you idiot!" because you almost (but did not) get my eye, and I didn't fully expect the sensation of a foam dart impacting in the soft flesh of my cheek.

Lastly (at least for this particular section), you didn't teach me anything. There was, after all, nothing to learn. I had no doubt you would pull the plastic trigger of your blue 'Spy Academy' toy gun. The only variable here was when you would get annoyed enough. After all, if you were wanting to prove that you wouldn't hesitate then you would've shot me when you drew the thing. The only question here was where the line was drawn.

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Next up for dissection is the following:
"This point was proved after he yelled at me as though the gun was actually a threat. Was it going to kill some vital 'I NEED TO PLEASE PEOPLE' brain cells or something? Nah, he just doesn't like me with a gun and finds me annoying. That accomplished my mission for the day."
Right. Here we go...

I did not yell. I didn't even speak in particularly raised tones. I didn't view the toy gun as a threat (who would? I'm not an idiot, Rinrei), rather it was an annoyance and an intrusion, not to mention a deliberate invitation to argue.

I do not have 'I Need to Please People' brain cells, though I admit that they would be useful. A foam bullet is hardly going to kill any cells at all, especially not when I have a not-too-thin, not-too-thick skull and a layer of skin covering that. If you're going to play your cards that way in trying to get me riled, keep on playing, but you'll lose. I like people to get their facts right.

You are right when you say I don't like you with a gun, but really? Did you expect anything different? It's not that you  have a gun so much as it's pointed at my head. That crosses the line - it's a built-in response, more a meme than anything else. It's an invitation to aggression, as I've said several times in the past over the course of this post.

Finally, you say 'that accomplished my mission'. I'm aware that you do your best to be annoying and irritating (why else would you act as you do?), but I'm afraid that that final comment seals it for me. I have nothing but pity for you, tinged with mild annoyance. If you're really going to do things simply to accomplish the 'mission' of annoying me, then fine, but know this: It's a really, really sad thing to do, let alone admit. The phrase 'You Have No Life' pops into mind as a ready response.

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I have one final part that I'd like to draw people's attention to.
"However, something in my brain tripped, and I turned the gun around and almost swung the handle into his face. I'm not sure why; something just irritated me all of a sudden. I'm one of those people who gets irritated by Pisces for no apparent reason. He's the same. Every now and then, he gets the urge to throttle me. I'm not entirely sure why."
You like to exaggerate, don't you? 'I almost swung the handle into his face', my rear end. Yeah right. What you actually did was turned it round, looked at it for a long second, and put it away. Or did you forget that?

I don't blame you for wishing to throttle me - I'm just one of those people. Then again, far too many people wanted to throttle Galileo, too, for much the same reason as you - you disagree with my views. People who take different views to the majority are open to hecklers and people with closed minds. After all, didn't I say that in my post?

This is my final point: You know nothing of what goes on in my head. Have I ever actually said that I wish to throttle you? Not that I recall. I say again: You have actually no idea what goes on in my head; you cannot comprehend the workings of my mind, just as I cannot fathom the way yours works. Comparing yourself to me is an ugly comparison. We are completely different in nearly every way, and that's a statement I'll only make because I've thought long and hard about it. So don't. Ever. Compare. Yourself. To me. Nobody has that right. For you have but scratched the surface, from what you're saying here. So just don't.

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I had no way to know that you were almost run down by a car, Rinrei. I also had no inclination to lock away my opinion, or avoid posting my opinion online. Because, let's face it, however much anyone presses a point such as this, it's simply an opinion.

In conclusion, I'm sorry for what happened to you, as it's obviously affected you deeper than even you may believe. You have my pity, but not my apologies. I shall not apologise for how I think, nor for how you take my opinion, my words, my thoughts. If you want to take it to heart, then go ahead. However, I feel that I simply need to say: Actions may speak louder than words, but sometimes a smaller dosage is what we require. I don't need to say that I'm sorry for something I was unaware of doing.

I have done nothing wrong.

Next time you decide to joke around with a toy gun, try to think through the possible consequences of your actions. And now I give you a chance, an offer to you that may just help. However, it all depends upon how you answer the following question:

What are you going to do next?

And remember, actions speak louder than words. Whatever you do next, I'll draw a conclusion from it. To quote Rush: "...if you choose not to decide, you still have made a choice."
Newton's Third Law: Every action has an equal and opposite reaction.
Oh, did you think it simply applied to physics? Think again.

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