Thursday 29 March 2012

Shoes, or A New Storage Scheme

I've had a revelation, and naturally, the good readers of this blog should be the first to know about it.

People are always running out of space. There never seem to be enough shelves, cupboards, wardrobes and boxes to pack those little things into. That's why I've decided that I should kick off the next big thing. It'll be a revolution when the big corporations get hold of it, I tell you.

That revolutionary idea is: Shoe shelves.

Shoes are hollow, yes? I certainly hope yours are. Otherwise, how would you wear them? Answer: With great difficulty. But I digress.

So shoes are hollow, yes? That makes them prime space for storing trinkets and small onions, if you happen to be the sort of person who piles onions in the corner. Also, shoes take up floor or shelf space that could be used for so many other things (for example, that bag of small onions at the end of your bed or hanging on the end of a tap in the second bathroom). Also, walls generally have lots of space on them - space not being put to use. That's simply because gravity conspires against us to make things not stick to vertical surfaces.

With all the above things in mind, you cannot fail to see where this is going. Yes, that's right: I'm proposing that you pack up your walls and place them inside your shoes.

Actually, that seems like it would be counter-productive. Instead, why not simply gather your shoes and nail them to the wall? (Though not while you're wearing them, obviously. That would be slightly painful.) There's so much space on those walls to nail those shoes in place. Then, you can shove all the onions you want into those little foot-sized hollows, and enjoy a tidy home coupled with an interesting display of potentially colourful shoes.

Alternatively, you could just put up some more shelves.

And that's all I have to say on the matter.

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